I'm not ready

Henry turns 11 months today, and it's hard for me to believe that in exactly one month, we will be celebrating his first birthday. I'm not ready.

I'm not ready for Henry to be one.
I'm not ready for him to start walking.
I'm not ready to have a toddler, not a baby.
I'm not ready for him to give up his bottle.
I'm not ready to wean him from nursing.
I'm not ready to go back to work and leave him a few days a week.
I'm not ready.

But, ready or not, just like Henry's birth, his birthday will come and everything that comes with him being one will come too. I'm procrastinating on decisions for his first birthday party, because while I will be excited and proud of him, I want his babyhood to last forever if it could. I felt the same way at every other big transition - solid food, sleeping through the night, teeth emergence. But with each stage comes new joys, so even though I'm building it up now, one will be great too. So for the mean time, I'm enjoying all of his 11 month, purely joyful, giggling self. And savoring every moment until August 14th. If anyone has a stop-time machine, now would be the time to produce it.

Happy 11 months Henry!